Singapore | Farewell My

And yet, I do not belong. That is the quiet ache of the expatriate, the migrant, the sojourner. I have lived here long enough to know the shortcuts, the best nasi lemak , the unspoken rules of queuing with a tissue packet. But I will never know what it means to sing the national anthem in a school hall with a hand over my heart. I will never know the fear of Merdeka or the pride of National Day from the inside. I am a guest. A grateful, heartbroken guest.

My Singapore. My temporary, permanent home.

Now, standing at the same departures gate, I am trying to learn how to say goodbye to a place that was never meant to be permanent, but became, somehow, home.

Farewell, my Singapore. Farewell to the shophouses of Joo Chiat, painted in pastel blues and yellows like a Wes Anderson film. Farewell to the Singlish I finally learned to speak— "Can, can," "Alamak," "Don't shy-shy" —words that will sound foreign on my tongue back home. Farewell to the perpetual summer, where Christmas comes with palm trees and air-conditioning. farewell my singapore

Tonight, I stand at Changi. It is raining outside—that sudden, violent tropical rain that turns the streets into rivers for fifteen minutes before vanishing like it never existed. I watch the planes take off. Somewhere, a family is reuniting. Somewhere, a student is leaving for university. Somewhere, a worker is flying home to see a newborn child.

Held onto the railings, the railings of Cavenagh Bridge. Looked at the skyline and said to myself: I will remember this.

As the plane lifts off, I press my forehead against the cold window. The city lights blur into a constellation—a string of gold and diamond against the black sea. You look so small from up here. So impossibly small. And yet, you contain worlds. And yet, I do not belong

How do you bid farewell to a city that runs on precision? The MRT doors close with a mechanical chime at exactly the same second every morning. The buses arrive on time. The food courts churn out kaya toast and soft-boiled eggs with the rhythm of a heartbeat. I have grown accustomed to this efficiency. I have grown to love the quiet order—the way the city breathes in unison, a million souls moving in choreographed chaos without ever truly colliding.

I learned to walk slowly here. In the beginning, I walked fast—like a foreigner, always chasing time. But Singapore taught me the art of the leisurely stroll through the Botanic Gardens at dusk, when the monitor lizards slip into the water and the fruit bats hang upside down like forgotten umbrellas. It taught me that in a nation famous for speed, the most important things move slowly: the growth of an orchid, the patience of a hawker perfecting the same bowl of noodles for forty years, the way a friendship forms over shared teh tarik in a coffee shop.

But know this, Singapore: You made me a better person. You taught me that a nation does not need a thousand years of history to have a soul. You taught me that a multiracial dream—Chinese, Malay, Indian, Eurasian—can work, even when it is fragile, even when it is imperfect. You taught me that success is not luck. It is kiasu determination, it is planning, it is the refusal to fail. But I will never know what it means

I did not hear the thunder when I first arrived. Singapore never announces itself with storms. It greets you with a warm, wet blanket of air—a tropical embrace that clings to your skin the moment the airport doors slide open. I remember thinking, This is what hope feels like. Sticky. Heavy. Full of possibility.

But my Singapore is not just the skyline of Marina Bay or the perpetual construction cranes that promise tomorrow’s future. My Singapore is the kopi-o uncle who remembers my order after three years. Siew dai (less sweet). He never asks my name. He just nods when he sees my face. My Singapore is the elderly Indian auntie feeding pigeons in the void deck of a Toa Payoh flat, even though it is technically illegal. My Singapore is the smell of durian mingling with jasmine at the wet market, the sound of Chinese opera drifting from a community center, the taste of laksa that burns my tongue in the best possible way.

Selamat tinggal. 再见. Goodbye.