(opens door) Ooh! Are you the pizza guy? Because I ordered a pizza with extra smiles, and you look very happy!

Here’s a solid text based on the prompt "Sam and Cat Matthew," keeping it in the tone of the show Sam & Cat . The Matthew Maneuver

I actually made a pros and cons chart. (Opens binder — it’s color-coded.) Pro: I’m good at math, so I can split the rent to the cent. Con: I’m allergic to feathers. So… pillow fights are out.

Uh, no. I’m Matthew. I’m here about the roommate ad?

Yay! A new friend! We’ll call you Matt-Matt-Science-Pants!

(stomps over) Let me see the fine print. (Reads from her phone) “Tough, fry-loving bad girl and perky redhead seek third roommate. Must tolerate violence, singing, and spontaneous pillow fights.” You in?

(gasp) No feathers?! What about tickle fights?