★★★★☆ (4/5 – A cult classic that grows sharper with age.)
Released in 1998 by DreamWorks Pictures and directed by Joe Dante ( Gremlins , The Howling ), Small Soldiers was marketed as a zany “toys come to life” adventure. In reality, it’s a sharp satire on military-industrial complex, corporate greed, and the ethics of artificial intelligence—wrapped in the packaging of a PG-13 toy commercial. The story follows Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith), a socially awkward teen whose father owns a failing novelty toy store. Alan lands a summer job and receives a shipment of the hottest new toys: the Commando Elite (hyper-aggressive action figures) and the Gorgonites (benevolent, misshapen creatures designed to lose). small.soldiers film
“Greetings, Alan. I am Archer, emissary of the Gorgonites. We seek only to find our way home.” – Archie Have you rewatched Small Soldiers recently? Did it scare you as a kid or make you want to join the Commandos? Let me know in the comments below. ★★★★☆ (4/5 – A cult classic that grows
If you grew up in the late 90s, there’s a good chance you remember the VHS cover for Small Soldiers . It promised chaos: a creepy, scarred doll holding a makeshift knife, standing next to a chisel-jawed action figure with grenades. But if you haven’t revisited it since the era of dial-up internet, you might be shocked by how dark, clever, and surprisingly mature this film actually is. Alan lands a summer job and receives a
It also bombed at the box office. Why? It was too violent for young kids and too silly for adults. But like the Gorgonites, it was misunderstood. It’s a war film that argues peace is possible, and a toy movie that warns us not to play with fire. If you haven’t watched Small Soldiers since you rented it from Blockbuster, do yourself a favor and stream it tonight. Look past the 90s CGI and appreciate the practical animatronics (courtesy of Stan Winston Studio). Listen to the dialogue. And remember: Everything else is just a toy.